Column: Coping with a plethora of dietary restrictions

I casually mentioned to a co-worker recently that I had some mini-muffins back in my office. “I had visitors earlier,” I said, by way of explanation.

“Oh, no thanks,” she said. “I’m off gluten."

Of course she is.

It seems like everyone is trying some kind of diet these days. Gluten-free. Keto. Paleo. Vegan.

It makes get-togethers tricky, as my sister and I learned when we planned my overnight visit to her house. I could bring my own cereal (my usual fare) for breakfast; she wouldn’t have any in the house, but she would have coconut milk and one percent lactose-free cow’s milk. I brought a breakfast bar, not because I was put off by those choices, but because it seemed easier and I’m not that hungry first thing.

I am no stranger to the complicated arrangements that now must be made when eating with others. About 30 years ago, I stopped eating beef and pork. That wasn’t much of an issue when I visited my mother. She had given up making big meat dishes after my father died. By this time, her signature dish was chicken pot pie, which I loved.

Meals with my in-laws were more of a challenge. My father-in-law liked to have meat at every meal. I would have been happy eating just vegetables; my mother-in-law almost always made a salad, and I could have easily filled up on that and rolls. But Rita liked to cook and feed people, and a salad-and-rolls meal wouldn’t do.

So she adapted recipes that called for ground beef by using ground turkey instead. I’m not sure her husband ever knew. Sometimes she’d make a ground beef version and a ground turkey version. Every once in a while, we’d just have chicken.

I felt guilty because of the work she put into my meals, but I knew it made her happy. She would have stressed out watching me just eat a salad.

When my sister and her husband took over the holiday festivities from my mother, they accommodated me. On Christmas Eve, there might be some meat, but we also had baked stuffed shrimp and stuffed shells.

For years, my no-meat policy was my only food idiosyncrasy. It became increasingly easier to adhere to, as more people recognized the benefits of eating less meat. Vegetarianism, and later, veganism, became more popular. Another helpful trend was the Mediterranean Diet, which emphasizes vegetables, fruits and seafood.

Then, I suddenly developed allergies to sesame and tree nuts. Now I was a person who couldn’t go anywhere without making sure none of these substances were in my food. Plus I wouldn’t eat beef or pork.

It took the joy out of eating.

Since these allergies came on so suddenly, I wondered last year if they might have disappeared. After testing, I learned I am now only allergic to almonds. That was a relief. Sesame doesn’t have to be labeled, so I was always worried about it sneaking into things. But nuts must be noted on food packaging, and restaurant menus usually mention if they are in an item. I even have a favorite restaurant that, I’ve been told by several servers, has no almonds at all in the kitchen!

When I had allergies to sesame and all tree nuts, I had to exercise an abundance of caution if I ate out. I almost never ate any bread products or desserts. As a result, I lost my taste for them. I also lost a lot of weight, partly due to the allergies. One co-worker asked me how I had done it, and before I could answer, said “You stopped eating gluten, right?”

That’s the thing about all these special diets. It’s like people are looking for a silver bullet. I’m sure giving up carbs can help you lose weight, but it’s not much fun. I cut my bread consumption, but I still ate pasta. It’s a mainstay of a plant-centric diet, which is how I think of the way I eat.

I guess I’m of two minds regarding diets that cut out great swathes of food types, like all animal products, all carbohydrates or all gluten. I know it can be done, because I gave up beef and pork and never looked back. I went without eating hummus, which I loved, for five years, because the commercial brands contain tahini, which is sesame paste.

I also think restricting our diets in some ways can be healthy. As in less salt, less sugar, less gluten.

On the other hand, if I encounter a really good baguette, I am going to have a piece. Though I’m rarely tempted by sweets anymore, I enjoyed sharing a delicious creme brûlée with my husband, Paul, the other day. Cutting back on flour and sugar is a positive step for anyone’s diet. But, personally, life is too short not to enjoy a wide range of good food in moderation.

My sister wanted to know what I wanted for dinner. I didn’t want her to go to too much trouble. I suggested soup or salad or a combination of both. She ended up making a homemade veggie soup. We ate it with saltines, because we’re both fine with a little gluten now and then. It was not only a delicious meal, it was perfect—for both of us.